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Deprecated: Non-static method CollectionVersion::get() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /virtual/mediacraft/public_html/tomatis.ear-voice.org/concrete/models/collection.php on line 33

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耳と声 :: 一年後
Deprecated: Non-static method Loader::db() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /virtual/mediacraft/public_html/tomatis.ear-voice.org/concrete/models/user.php on line 83

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Strict Standards: Non-static method PermissionsCache::exists() should not be called statically in /virtual/mediacraft/public_html/tomatis.ear-voice.org/concrete/models/permissions.php on line 69

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一年後

一年近い月日が過ぎて行きました。来る日も来る日も誰に質問する機会もなくひたすらハミングを繰り返していました。できるようになったのか,なっていないのか不安の中で過ごした一年、止めてしまった方がどんなに楽だろうと思った事も何回も有りました。

その度に博士の声、博士の手の暖かさそして博士の身体の振動それらの感覚が止めてしまって良いの?と私に問いかけて来ました。知りたいと思ったことをなげだすの?というささやきが聞こえて来ました。

そうこう迷いを持ちながら日々ハミングを繰り返し、メモをとったノ一トを読み返しながら過ごしているうちに博士のCAVを見学する機会がやって来ました。
前回と同じに後ろの席に座って博士の声を聞き通訳の言葉を書く、でも前回とまったく違ったのです。何故か博士の声も通訳の言葉も知っているという感覚なのです。意味が分かる気がしました。二日目、三日目と最後の日までそれがはっきりと解りました。

一年間、ハミングと博士の声と通訳の言葉そしてCAVインストラクタ一のレッスンこれらのことが知らない間に私を成長させてくれていたのです。

いよいよ博士のレッスンの日が来ました。
その日は見学がない日でしたので貯まっていた私の生徒達の声楽のレッスンを博士のレッスンぎりぎりまでしてからトマテイスセンタ一に行きました。大切なレッスンの時に身体が疲れていました。頭で解っても身体が上手くコントロ一ル出来ないのです。

その時の博士の言葉に私は一年間頑張った理由が解りました。
博士の言葉です。「お前のレッスンを受けた生徒は可哀想、何故なら教えているお前が疲れているということは良いエネルギ一を生徒に与えることはできない。まず自分を大切にしそして自分を愛しなさいそうしたら愛は溢れます。その溢れる愛を持ってレッスンをしなさい。溢れる愛で接することで相手のキャッチしてくれる情報量が増す。そしてお前も疲れない。自分に対する愛があったら疲れることはしない。そして溢れる愛を持ってした行為には代償を求めない。あの時あんなにやってあげたのにと言わない」と言われました。

実にその通り、この言葉を聞く為に博士に出会ったのだと感じました。そしてレッスンは日を改めてと終わりになってしまいました。疲れた私に教えることはないということです。素晴らしいと私はやたら感動しました。

その日以来、すべてのことは楽しくやって行こうと決めました。現在もそれを守っています。楽しくやれることだけ一生懸命やって行こうと決めました。

それから改めて時間を頂きました。この日の衝撃がまた凄いのです。

レッスンがスタ一トしました。ハミングを何回も何回も繰り返しました。色々な音程で繰り返し小さなフレ一ズを沢山繰り返しそれからハミングを増幅すること、結局その日のすべての時間はハミングでした。博士の仰るハミングに始まりハミングに終わるを身を以て体感させられました。

その後、博士は私にCAVの受講者がどんどん増えて来ているから来月からお前がフォロ一アップをするのだ、と仰るのです。私は即座に「できません」とお断りをしました。すると博士は「教えろと言ってはいない、受講者のハミングを聴くだけで良い」と言われるのです。「お前は音を聞き分ける耳を持っている、その耳を使って聴いていれば良い。セリフは3つ。その1ハミングができていたら「ハイそうです」。その2では「音程を変えてみて下さい」。その3ハミングができていなかったら「もう一度やって下さい」。またできていなかったら「良く聴きながらもう一度やって下さい」。この3つのセリフ以外は何も言ってはいけない。特に否定的な言葉は絶対に禁止と言われました。

次の月からフォロ一アップがスタートしました。三ヶ月は可も無く不可も無く過ぎて行きました。受講者のハミングをひたすら聴き,ハミングしている姿をひたすら観察していました

四ヶ月目に何故うまくできないのか解ってしまい,博士との約束を破りアドバイスしてしまいました。その日の仕事が終わってから、オ一ナ一に博士との約束を破ってしまったことを告げ、パリのセンタ一に問い合わせて貰いました。

その答えが素晴らしいのです。博士の返事は「お前がそうなる時を待っていた。来月からは否定的な言葉以外何を言っても構わない、好きなようにアドバイスをしてあげなさい」と言われました。以後、言葉を選びながら今まで以上に慎重に耳を傾け、観察しながら私の言葉で楽しく仕事をしました。

CAVインストラクタ一のアシスタントも少しずつやらせてもらい,たくさんの注意を受けながら育っていくのが解りました。

博士のレッスンを受けてから一年近い日が流れたある日、CAVインストラクタ一の方が「私はすべてのことを貴女に伝えた。この後すぐ来月の博士のレッスンを受けにパリのセンタ一に来なければならない、さもないといつまでたってもCAVを貴女がすることはできない」と言われました。
この日にスタ一トできるようにと言われた日まで一ヶ月を切っていました。


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